Chris, it does look like a female to me too. My female female convict kept me guessing for a long time before she finally sported her orange stomach. Perhaps this is a subdominent female that isn't showing her color. Depending on the size of the tank and the oscar, you may be able to keep the oscar with the cons, but I would get that kissing gourami out before the cons start to pair up. I have my cons in a 29g and the male is twice the size of the female, if not larger, and have breed a few times already.
Good luck with your new additions zig zag