1) what gravel is best? Can I use shingle?
I have no idea what shingle is? A nice medium or larger grain sand is probably best, some people also go bare bottom (personally I don't care for that look). Sugar sized or other very small grain sand can be a pain and blow all over the tank. Gravel will allow any floating particles to settle down in there and basically rot, and need to be cleaned pretty regularly or it will cause problems. You could use gravel, but keep in mind that certain species need sand if you plan to get them (ie, certain gobies, snails, shrimp).
2) what is the most effective filtration system /method?
Live rock as the main "filter" (see #6 below). Otherwise, protein skimming is most popular and is effective with a good quality skimmer (research which ones are good and which are crap... there are a lot of crap ones). Reef Octopus gets lots of good reviews. Refugiums, filter socks, or algae turf scrubbers are a few other options (usually used in conjunction with skimming)
3) how do I make a simple *sump? Diagrams and full details are required please!
You can buy one, or use tank into which you can silicone in the baffles (dividers).
Good info:
Melevsreef.com | Acrylic Sumps & Refugiums
4) what is the best pump to use? Should I use 1 or 2?
If you have a sump, you will need a return pump to return the water from the sump back into the tank. You will also want at least one powerhead inside the tank for water movement, in addition to the return pump flow. I like Hydor Koralia powerheads - these are available in many sizes, VERY quiet, and have a cool magnet suction cup to secure it in place.
5) what is a protein skimmer?
The saltwater equivalent of a power filter - it basically creates a tube of water with microbubbles, which dissolved organics (nitrates, ammonia, nitrites) adhere to. The microbubbles then float up into a collection cup, bringing those organics with them and out of the tank. These can be either in a sump or hang on back - in sump ones are more efficient, but either way you want a good reliable one that does its job.
6) is live reef or coral better that rocks?
Corals are living organisms. They require good water quality (depending on the coral, they may require pristine water quality). They may also require other supplements or individual feeding, again depending on the type. Most require moderate to strong lighting. Easier corals do not require much aside from good water and appropriate light.
Live rock is good whether or not you have coral. Live rock is the basic filtration of the saltwater tank. They are actual rocks, which have beneficial bacteria growing on them and often many other organisms (depending on the source of the rocks). Water movement in and through the rocks is important, so bacteria will utilize the ammonia (from fish waste) and turn it into nitrite and then nitrate, which is removed via protein skimming and water changes. Live rocks also provide hiding and foraging places for fish, places to mount and grow corals, and of course interest to the look of the aquarium. Keep in mind that you can start a tank with nearly all dry or base rock, with just a few pieces of live rock, and it will all become live eventually.
7) what are the best 5 fish to start with?
That is very subjective, but generally the more hardy, peaceful (generally - unless you are doing a very large tank with limited tankmates and invertebrates), and easy to feed / get eating are the ones that are good for beginners. Taste and budget play a big role in "the best 5 fish," along with compatibility with other fish, inverts, and tank size.
Clownfish are hardy but most of the bigger ones get very aggressive (and will often go after their owner's hands) - percula and ocellaris are good clowns, as well as all the "designer" clowns that are color morphs of those two. Most gobies are good, chromis, gramma, blenny, cardinals, firefish, etc.
Research any fish before you buy it - many fish sold may have significant problems including large size (think 1-2' plus), difficulty or near impossibility to feed, and severe aggression. Many fish are also jumpers and require a secure top.
8) is sea water better or salt water?
Sea water is salt water... If you mean is water out of an ocean better than making artificial saltwater from a mix, that is probably up for debate. Obviously if you are close to a coast real sea water is an option, if you are not salt mix is definitely the only option. Most recommend using RO/DI water to mix the saltwater, as most straight tap water has undesirables that RO/DI filtration will remove.
