Views on fish keeping
- Thread starter jo3olous
- Start date
Oh okay. Well people on the forum don't usually get the crooked eye once they reveal their actual intentions. Believe me if you posted any kind of hint that you're here to learn, then everyone loses the crooked eye.
If you felt people were attacked when something like...
Newbie: but the guy at the fish store said I could do....
MFTer: don't listen to people @ fish stores! they just want your money!
well the obvious, we're trying to build your resistance to being suckered and letting you know they were wrong. Obviously not the best way to approach people who are over sensitive, but it gets the job done.
I can say for myself that if peoples user name sounds very soft, I will try to make very gental posts, but every person in the world using the internet should grow skin a bit thicker, I mean it's the internet! It should be rather hard to get offended by words, you can't even tell what context theyre in exactly. I am sorry firsttimefreshie, I feel as if I have bullied you in a past life now
just wanted to note; yes some fish stores do have honest good people with the best intentions of customers future fish keeping experience. 90% however, just want your money and really don't care what happens. Either way, this is no excuse to slack off on research! Just consider how you treat the rest of your life; Do you purchase a car or have a child without planning ahead? Fish obviously have nowhere near the same impact, but it shouldn't be overlooked to the point its on the level with what toothbrush to get at Walgreens when you need a new one. 
Good thread!
I'm pretty sure my post in the monster fish thread brought this topic up but it is a good topic that I don't think I have ever seen addressed here. For those who haven't seen yet, I posted my viewpoints in the monster fish thread on page 3.
No worries, cultural differences are cultural differences and they do exist within the US. I don't like honky-dory either, lol.
That is key to the internet. In an online debate, you have to always keep your cool. The person that loses their cool first usually loses the debate because no one listens to you when you are yelling at them or flaming them. I used to be alot more hostile. But now I just wait for someone to slip up. Sometimes I wait awhile to respond to a thread. That post in my monster fish thread actually took me two hours to type up and I kept going back and looking at how it would be interpreted.
That thread with the person that said they were going to filet their Iridescent Shark when it gets too big may have very well been a troll. But it was pretty funny though. Many forums have trolls. Ever post on any game forums for Blizzard games? The vast majority of threads are troll threads. The moderators who are Blizzard employees participate in the trolling too if that makes any sense. This forum doesn't tolerate trolls or flames so we don't really see them here.
College's really stoke your ego. I came out of college with a business degree thinking I was awesome. But my overbearing attitude got me to boardicide from forum once because the other members didn't like it and had a personal vendetta against me. As much as people shouldn't take things personally, they do and it is just a fact of human nature. So I have since adapted to that. Certain topics I try to remain neutral as possible.
I also no longer assume I am always right. I might concede if the other party has a good argument. One that is truly smart knows that they don't know everything and should always be willing to learn something new.
Anyhow, I am trying to avoid offending you. You seem like a good knowledgeable guy. You seem to be much like I was a few years ago. I just wanted to give you some forum tips so you can make sharing your knowledge and experiences alot more effective.
I'm pretty sure my post in the monster fish thread brought this topic up but it is a good topic that I don't think I have ever seen addressed here. For those who haven't seen yet, I posted my viewpoints in the monster fish thread on page 3.
No worries, cultural differences are cultural differences and they do exist within the US. I don't like honky-dory either, lol.
That is key to the internet. In an online debate, you have to always keep your cool. The person that loses their cool first usually loses the debate because no one listens to you when you are yelling at them or flaming them. I used to be alot more hostile. But now I just wait for someone to slip up. Sometimes I wait awhile to respond to a thread. That post in my monster fish thread actually took me two hours to type up and I kept going back and looking at how it would be interpreted.
That thread with the person that said they were going to filet their Iridescent Shark when it gets too big may have very well been a troll. But it was pretty funny though. Many forums have trolls. Ever post on any game forums for Blizzard games? The vast majority of threads are troll threads. The moderators who are Blizzard employees participate in the trolling too if that makes any sense. This forum doesn't tolerate trolls or flames so we don't really see them here.
College's really stoke your ego. I came out of college with a business degree thinking I was awesome. But my overbearing attitude got me to boardicide from forum once because the other members didn't like it and had a personal vendetta against me. As much as people shouldn't take things personally, they do and it is just a fact of human nature. So I have since adapted to that. Certain topics I try to remain neutral as possible.
I also no longer assume I am always right. I might concede if the other party has a good argument. One that is truly smart knows that they don't know everything and should always be willing to learn something new.
Anyhow, I am trying to avoid offending you. You seem like a good knowledgeable guy. You seem to be much like I was a few years ago. I just wanted to give you some forum tips so you can make sharing your knowledge and experiences alot more effective.
Just so you know, the large/super fish thing really means nothing, I know of one member that owned maybe 2 fish that was a large or super fish in like 4 months, it only has to do with how many posts you make in the forums, outside the lounge and 1 other one, another good example is the new guy with the gar and the other fish, in a week he had over 100 posts because he asked alot of questions, which is good, but as you can see you should take the "title" with a grain of salt.
And Jo3..know worries, I am from cincy so I know all about the attitude, but I have realized (recently) it does alot more harm than good, regardless of a forum, job or personal life especially if life takes you to areas where that is not accepted regardless if its a city or in the middle of know where.
And Jo3..know worries, I am from cincy so I know all about the attitude, but I have realized (recently) it does alot more harm than good, regardless of a forum, job or personal life especially if life takes you to areas where that is not accepted regardless if its a city or in the middle of know where.
I'm happy to see some new(er) members posting here. I hope many more will contribute!
Rhetoric is about dissolving the personal ego and getting down to matters of individual & social truths, and writing is rhetoric, even on a message board. Where you're from, what you do, how much money you make, etc., are all ego driven and bias the truth. Strong social societies are driven based upon respect and understanding, and the ability to educate & interact without bias. The dice will fall where they may, but it gives no one the right to judge. You sometimes can't help how you feel and react, but you can try. You should never stop trying to become a better person--there's always something to learn--there are infinite angles to any situation.
People come here with problems or wanting to learn something. The best we can do is educate, and it's not a quick process. Patience is necessary. Our jobs as regular members here, if you want to call it that, is based upon repetition. Our reward is the success of another, and it's a worthwhile cause. There are many that come here and leave far more educated and happy that they've achieved their goal. YOU played a part in that. YOU were part of the team, even if you knew it or not. Just because you aren't singled out and rewarded with praise doesn't mean no one cared about your advice.
Fish keeping, in and of itself, isn't really that difficult--it simply takes effort, but to get the most out of it requires the ability to get the most out of another person or group. Be willing to learn because people love to share. Social skills will generally dictate your ability to succeed in most any situation.
Rhetoric is about dissolving the personal ego and getting down to matters of individual & social truths, and writing is rhetoric, even on a message board. Where you're from, what you do, how much money you make, etc., are all ego driven and bias the truth. Strong social societies are driven based upon respect and understanding, and the ability to educate & interact without bias. The dice will fall where they may, but it gives no one the right to judge. You sometimes can't help how you feel and react, but you can try. You should never stop trying to become a better person--there's always something to learn--there are infinite angles to any situation.
People come here with problems or wanting to learn something. The best we can do is educate, and it's not a quick process. Patience is necessary. Our jobs as regular members here, if you want to call it that, is based upon repetition. Our reward is the success of another, and it's a worthwhile cause. There are many that come here and leave far more educated and happy that they've achieved their goal. YOU played a part in that. YOU were part of the team, even if you knew it or not. Just because you aren't singled out and rewarded with praise doesn't mean no one cared about your advice.
Fish keeping, in and of itself, isn't really that difficult--it simply takes effort, but to get the most out of it requires the ability to get the most out of another person or group. Be willing to learn because people love to share. Social skills will generally dictate your ability to succeed in most any situation.
My posting style I tend to try and bring up humane treatment of the fish themselves. It seems a lot of fish owners don't seem to care if their fish are suffering or not. Like a lot of people, I started this hobby over a weekend when I was looking for something to do. I did everything wrong at first of course. I think fish stores in general need more public education about how to properly care for pet fish, but I digress...
I try to be as helpful as possible without angering posters. One thing that ALWAYS annoys me and usually sends me off the forum for a few days is when I post a helpful/truthful answer to a question and someone else with little or no experience posts a "guessing" answer. Newbies don't know who knows their stuff or not and it pains me to think some have taken this incorrect advice. A recollection from awhile ago was when someone had their new oscar lying on the bottom of the tank and it was obvious it was ammonia poisoning but a newer poster went on and on about having a "shy" oscar. Unfortunately the original poster took this "shy" oscar advice instead of mine and the fish died a few days later, after he'd finally purchased a test kit and realized the ammonia levels were through the roof. I felt bad and annoyed about this for a long while afterwards and had to take a break from the forums. Anyways, that was getting off topic, I guess my point is that not knowing the answer is OK, that's why it's a forum and there are lots of different people here to help. Spewing out advice to newbies who can't discern between real advice and guesses only hurts the fish involved.
Making newbies feel like idiots or pointing out their every mistake only scares them away. Start slow with water quality and cycling and build from there. And to the newbies, never be shy to message someone personally that you trust, my email is listed on my site linked below and I actually answer lots of questions from newbies too afraid to post on this forum for fear of being flamed. Proper fishkeeping is in everyone's best interest!
I try to be as helpful as possible without angering posters. One thing that ALWAYS annoys me and usually sends me off the forum for a few days is when I post a helpful/truthful answer to a question and someone else with little or no experience posts a "guessing" answer. Newbies don't know who knows their stuff or not and it pains me to think some have taken this incorrect advice. A recollection from awhile ago was when someone had their new oscar lying on the bottom of the tank and it was obvious it was ammonia poisoning but a newer poster went on and on about having a "shy" oscar. Unfortunately the original poster took this "shy" oscar advice instead of mine and the fish died a few days later, after he'd finally purchased a test kit and realized the ammonia levels were through the roof. I felt bad and annoyed about this for a long while afterwards and had to take a break from the forums. Anyways, that was getting off topic, I guess my point is that not knowing the answer is OK, that's why it's a forum and there are lots of different people here to help. Spewing out advice to newbies who can't discern between real advice and guesses only hurts the fish involved.
Making newbies feel like idiots or pointing out their every mistake only scares them away. Start slow with water quality and cycling and build from there.
And to the newbies, never be shy to message someone personally that you trust, my email is listed on my site linked below and I actually answer lots of questions from newbies too afraid to post on this forum for fear of being flamed. Proper fishkeeping is in everyone's best interest!